Massushiro or Spring Cleaning
by Blue Fey
Summary: A simple mission: Clean Uchiha Sasuke's House... but what will happen when something more than flowers bloom in the spring? KaksSasu yaoi, sweetness, BIRDS![read for more]
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto, if I did, I'd most likely get drunk and lose it in a bet...**

**I can't have nice things...**

**Warning... KakashiXSasuke... yaoi... Sasuke is like...12**

_massushiro a phrase, means "clean and white"_

* * *

There is a strange doctrine of adults that requires annual spring cleaning to concurrently purge the house and body of filthiness. Yet Sasuke Uchiha had lived without an adult for many years, and never saw the need to commence the act of spring cleaning. The great manor of the Uchiha family had systematically fallen to a state of forlorn sadness as consequence. 

Kakashi had seen the unkempt gardens, the poor condition of the tiled roof and rice paper walls rotted to the point of collapse. Often, the copy nin witnessed families of crows making nest in the parts of the house that Sasuke was oddly ignorant of. The crows were of particular irritation when shadowing his student, not afraid of a ninja of his skill and often becoming aggressive if he got to close. It was almost as if the young Uchiha had a very unique form of home security.

He couldn't allow his dark-eyed student to suffer in the house as it was, but to hell with anyone thinking he would do it alone.

Kakashi had gone through all the paperwork to submit a special mission anonymously, hoping the authenticity would persuade two other genin to do the work for him. Of coarse, Sasuke will hate having his privacy violated…but to hell with Sasuke…scratch that; to hell with Sasuke's privacy.

The silver haired jonin made a mental note to come up with a more original curse.

* * *

Sasuke waited at the usual bridge for his team and a certain copy nin he suspected of following him for little longer than a week. It looked like it would be a calm, uneventful day of simpleminded missions and light training. The dark crows nesting in the nearby trees sang to the clear sky, and even Itachi and Orochimaru seemed in good spirits. Sasuke spied the two super villains a little ways off in the distance giggling like schoolgirls as they braded flowers into one another's hair. 

The little Uchiha didn't know why they were in Konohona, but didn't wish to confront the evil men for fear of losing his virginity. He figured they weren't causing any trouble as it was. Still, he was upset about not being the center of either's attention.

Naruto poofed to the overhang of the bridge that usually perched Kakashi. The dark Uchiha stared up in modest concern as he was suddenly struck with the possible event of two ninjas trying to occupy the same space. He pictured a deformed Narushi/ Kakauto that would be spawned as the simple transportation jutsu bent their molecules together.

Naruto quickly brought Sasuke from his twisted thoughts with a friendly rock to the face.

Sasuke, his face red from the sudden impact, couldn't help but scream at Naruto's stupid act. "Why the hell did you do that you little shit?"

Naruto sprang up to his feet as he balanced himself on Kakashi's perch, "It's just a happy rock to cheer you up!"

"Happy?" Sasuke looked down to the fist sized rock at his feet and saw a mischievous happy face drawn on it.

_The fuck?_

Konohona's Number-One-Knuckle-Headed-Ninja jumped down toward Sasuke to where they were just inches from one another, completely bursting the Uchiha's invisible touch bubble (and his hopes of Kakauto being spawned). The blonde grabbed his arm tightly with both hands as he tugged his taller team mate down with his fox like smile. Sasuke's normally placid features were twisted with confusion at the unaccustomed proximity, but instead of using the 'happy' rock to 'happily' bash Naruto's face in, he resigned himself to find what had the orange ninja so excited.

"So, Sasuke," Naruto started, dropping any honorifics as he pulled Sasuke closer, "Iruka-san told me Kakashi-sensei asked the Hokage for some special assignment! Do you think it has to do with the jutsu Sensei said he would teach us about?"

With one good push and what sounded like 'baka' from the Uchiha, the blonde was stumbling back over the bridge railing and into the river still cold from the early morning. Looking down to see a surly soaked idiot who dared further invade the touch bubble, Sasuke felt his own smirk vanish as Naruto poofed into smoke and a strong kick was dealt to his back. The kick wasn't enough to send Sasuke over, though, and so the taller boy turned and tackled his teammate.

When Kakashi appeared in his usual spot above to bridge, he was quick to notice the rare sounds of laughter among breathless grunts coming from his two students' horseplay. In silence most befitting of a stalker-umm…shinobi- he found himself to be entranced by the sight of childhood play. Such nostalgic moments would be uncommon in the life of a ninja; he himself can count the number of such events on one hand.

Sasuke was pined under Naruto's weight, his arms locked to his sided by the blonde's legs. The orange-clad genin used his position to at first mess the other's dark locks, but now settled with teasing him via spit-drip-torture. Kakashi watched as the so-named prodigy student winced in disgust from the ever lower lugy, with strands of so green grass tangled into his dark hair, and how he squirmed playfully under Naruto.

With a slow, lazy blink to the scene, the Copy-nin alerted his presents with a deliberate cough. Quick as light along polished silver, the two turned their attention toward him, Naruto sucking up his spit just before it fell onto Sasuke's face.

Waiting a moment to be sure he held their interest, Kakashi determined it time for his best excuse ever, one he had been holding on to for days waiting for a moment such as this to use.

"Sorry I'm late, I got lonely and my hand was tired so I had to find a woman of exceptionable ability… quite an exotic one, as I recall she had a-"

"Hentai!" was the chorus of the two interrupting their teacher's perverted explanation.

Naruto waited a second before adding 'liar' to his earlier outbreak.

Kakashi saw Sasuke cast a quick, confuse glance at the blonde before shrugging off the seemingly misplaced comment, the Uchiha assuming Naruto added it forsake of consistence. The truth, however, was much more that the reason of calling their sensei a liar every morning…

A clap of Kakashi's gloved hands brought his present students' attention back to him for a second before-

"CHA!" screamed a pink haired kunoichi as she ran like a possessed demon toward the bridge as a large dust cloud lifted behind her from her sheer speed. Yet in all her desperate running, her quite clean, blown-dried hair floated around her in a radiant pink halo, her lips so shinny they sparkled blindingly from the great distance covered till she stood side-by-side with her two other teammates. Upon closer inspection, Kakashi saw the third and final member had darkened her lashes with makeup and her rosy cheeks were more than the results of her harsh run. The sensei regretted informing the girl of the day's mission, but if there was a more dependable partner in crime, he was yet to see them.

The silver-haired ninja was also very glad to see a large, full tote hanging across her chest. Inside the dark green bag would be the tools paramount to the success of this mission. It had been easy to convince Sakura to help with the mission; he only needed Naruto's agreement to outnumber the inevitable objections of Sasuke.

Naruto eyed the bag suspiciously, in his mind hoping it was the special lunch hand-made by Sakura with love, the lunch where she would confess her love for the heroic blonde ninja he was. Sasuke noted that the pink teammate smelt strongly of strawberry and some other sweet fruits and the fragrance spoiled the scent of clean grass and water that he enjoyed at the bridge; and that her dramatic arrival had startled the wild Itachi and Orochimaru, whom had galloped far into the cover of the woods not unlike two deer.

Kakashi coughed once again to capture the attention of the now complete Team 7. Three pairs of eyes looked up to their sensei's perch, only to find it empty. A moment of silence passed before each felt a thump on the backs of their heads and turning around; the Copy-nin being behind them and armed with his orange book.

The more experienced ninja looked pleased as his three charges stared at him with expressions ranging from confusion to annoyance. He timed it perfectly, just as Naruto opened his mouth to object, the jonin shoved a scroll between the blonde's teeth.

"We are to go on a class B mission, should you accept" he began, earning sparkly eyes from a very happy Naruto. "It will be quite dangerous, for all of us. In truth, only one of you knows the details of the mission" here he placed a hand on Sakura's shoulder as he shared a special wink with her (only Sakura could tell the difference between a wink and a blink from Kakashi Hell knows why), "out of courtesy to your parents, incase you don't survive."

The jonin was proud that Sakura didn't burst out laughing from the over-dramatic tone of his words. In fact, she played her role perfectly, giving a just loud-enough nervous gulp and tightening the grip on her green bag. It almost made up for the fact she was dressed to look like she was going on a date.

Their acting had its desired effect, Naruto looked so happy he could burst, while Sasuke steeled himself in acceptance to the yet undefined mission.

Now Kakashi look to his male students as he continued.

"With more agreeable circumstances, you two wouldn't even be considered for this assignment; but because Sakura-chan is an indispensable asset and you having worked so well with her as a team, the Hokage has overlooked some rules to allow you to go on the mission." Here, Kakashi looked at each boy. "Think carefully, once you accept, you cannot back out of this operation; you must see it is successful."

Kakashi loved being dramatic.

Naruto thought of defeating lions and saving Sakura's, while Sasuke imagined kicking the shit out of Itachi, not flower-braiding, maypole dancing one, but the evil clan-killer one.

_Hook, line and sinker,_ Kakashi though.

"What's the mission?" inquired Sasuke, the first to break the theatrical silence.

"Confidential in till accepted" was Kakashi answered.

A moment passed, and the Copy-nin was mildly worried he made the job sound to difficult and they would decline… but no, they knew Sakura was going, and despite the team's conflicts, they had become friends. Sasuke and Naruto both had a moral code that demand they stick by their friends.

"I'll go…" it was Naruto who spoke first.

Sasuke nodded in agreement.

"Good" said Kakashi, clapping his palms together once again. "Let's go clean Sasuke-kun's house!"

Kakashi wished he had a camera that moment… and a steel cage to protect him.

* * *

**TBC**

**(P.S. Still looking for a beta... if my bad, icky writting didn't clue you in...)**

**(P.S.S. Wanted: reviews dead or alive**

**Reward: ... Another chapter?)**

**(P.S.S.S. Live reviews perfered...)**


	2. Chapter 2

**I don't own Naruto, it owns me…**

* * *

The house was had once been beautiful, that much was clear. The fusuma still bore the faded recreations of art masters like Fan Kuan, while the outer shoji walls where capped by intricate wooden transom, brilliantly outlined by the morning sun, and allowing fresh air into the room. The rice-paper walls, Kakashi noticed, had been shut tightly to block out the encroaching decay from other parts of the house. The entrance had hard wood floors, the polish worn and the stain slowly faded from years of use and neglect, while the larger portion of the nihou-ma (a grand size of a nine mat room 1). In another room, Kakashi saw the tokonoma alcove, covered with years of dust. He noted that the vase was empty of flowers, and the scroll hanging was of the summer season. 

Kakashi could see how the overwhelming job of spring cleaning the Uchiha mansion had been ranked as a B class mission. The tatami mats in side rooms were covered in dust, while in some rooms furniture was exposed to disuse and time, others where covered with once white sheets and stood silently to haunt the random room. Few nihou-mas were in good shape, the kitchen, laundry, and a nice sized bedroom all close to the left of the house grounds. The few hallways between each were little better off than other parts, mostly because these areas were outside walkways cleaned by nature.

He wasn't lying when he said Sakura was a vital member to the success of the mission. It was obvious they'll need a woman's touch 2.

It had been humorous to see the twos' reaction when the specifics of their mission were revealed. Sasuke had tried to punch the silver-haired jonin and found himself entangled tightly between Kakashi's arms and chest, his feet off the ground. The perverted sensei had remembered how Sasuke smelt… like tomatoes. Naruto, having seen that (for once) a direct attack wouldn't get him out of cleaning, tried distracting him with his Sexy Jutsu, only to find that resulted in Sasuke dropped on the ground and Naruto's female avatar in his place.

Sakura dropped the heavy green bag on the center of the floor, still wearing her shoes in the house because of the state of the floor. Out from it spilled bottles of home repair supplies and tools like hammers, saws, and many nails. She heaved a sigh of relief as though a great weight had been lifter… or dropped to be more accurate.

It had taken most of the day and still more work had to be done. Naruto had fallen through the roof in the southwest area of the house, which resulted in Kakashi's discovery of a possible reason for the large amount of crows on the Uchiha property. It seems that for years a large termite colony had invaded that vicinity of the home, giving the birds a large, steady food supply.

On the subject of Naruto, he was still disappointed that his special lunch had turned out to be a bag of inedible repair tools. Knowing he was being stupid, he still tried to eat a wing nut, which he found was quite efficient at blocking one's airway. Sakura took him to the hospital, though. It was something Naruto would have been very happy to know about had he not fallen unconscious from lack of air by the time Kakashi mentioned his suffocation to the pink kunoichi.

It was a bit past sunset by the time Kakashi looked up from the latest release of the notorious _Icha, Icha_ series to observe after some time the crows weren't flying away as they should have been, and went towards the back section of the house where he'd seen the Uchiha go to.

Sasuke sat on a western styled canopy bed in the corner of what was a child's room. The once light blue, now faded green, framed his relaxed body, dwarfing him in the most innocent manner. His dark eyes stared up at the nesting birds, but were unfocused. His bare feet rouse up the layers of dust on the once matching blue carpet, a single jigsaw piece gripped between his toes from a puzzle that was left unfinished for four years. Some nest had been made some time ago in the room, in which a large, fat crow slept lazily in its hidden space within a lampshade on a once blue nightstand.

Without a sound, Kakashi made his way to his student's side on the small bed. If the dark-eyed Uchiha noticed him, he showed no signs of it, a signal telling the Copy-nin the closeness was fine with him. He made no attempt to invade the younger boy's touch bubble, knowing and understanding the want to not be close to anyone, physically and more.

Kakashi was surprised to feel his student rest against him.

Though the spring sunlight had begun to fade into evening, Sasuke's body was warm like the midday sidewalk, but infinitely softer. This close, Kakashi could catch the earthy fragrance from the Uchiha's favorite shampoo, and the delicate scent of tomato from his body wash as he had earlier that day. This close he smelt like an herb and vegetable garden, but underneath was something sweeter, like the musk of wildflowers.

The lazy crow opened an eye and cawed at the man who's name means scarecrow, before going back to sleep.

"They're getting used to you, Sensei." Sasuke reflected softly, relieved that the birds hadn't flocked and attacked the man next to him.

A bead of sweat formed on the side of the jonin's face and perhaps a faint blush if one looked close enough, but Sasuke was leaning his head against Kakashi's arm with his soft, dark eyes shut gently.

"There's an old legend of my clan" Sasuke murmured as he raised his arm and called out to the sleeping bird, which in turn awoke and flapped down to his pale hand.

"My nii… Itachi told me, that long ago many demons lived with man and taught us to use chakra."

Kakashi had heard many legends of similar accounts in his years.

"He told me of the tengu, the crow demons… that our clan comes from them."3

"I never heard that." Kakashi admitted as he stared at the crow in his student's hand, feather's black as Uchiha hair.

"You said you would teach us a jutsu, Kakashi-sensei…" Sasuke interjected to change the subject. The Copy-nin felt goose bump rise on his arms as he thought of the boy next to him calling him 'sensei' on the small child's bed.

"Hai, tomorrow." he promised.

"Sensei…could you teach me tonight, please?" Sasuke said as he nuzzled against the older man's arm much like a cat.

More sweat formed on Kakashi's face as he imagined what he could teach his pretty student that night. Yet the crow, being a very intelligent animal, also knew what was on the perverted man's mind, and being that Sasuke was of his flock was critically against what he was being planned.

The people living in Konohona were quite surprised by the sight of a much panicked jonin on the run from a murder of crows seeming bent on the jonin's demise. Needless to say it would become a fitting tale to repeat during special festivals and nights of drinking for years to come, much to the horror of the story's victim.

It was much later that night when Kakashi found himself in his own bed thinking of the way Sasuke was so close to him, and of course of angry crows and tengu…

* * *

The next morning, a couple dozen crows followed the scarecrow as he walked toward Sasuke's house. He had Guy's team work the night shift of operation 'Spring Clean' after he realized the insurmountable work involved in his plan and was pleased to find many of the walls rebuilt, the crows nest gone (yay), and that the furniture cleaning service had picked up the furnishings for cleaning as scheduled. 

It was the perfect day for the new jutsu he wanted to teach them.

He called Sakura, telling her that stage two is a go in two hours.

He watched Sasuke a bit, sleeping in the room the back left of the house grounds, one of the few rooms clean enough that the furniture could stay. Kakashi knew it had once been his brother's room, and that it had stayed the same in four years except for the clothes in the closet. It would have been peaceful, sitting in the lush green tree as he watched his pretty student sleeping soundly, but his black-feathered entourage made a quick habit of perching in his view, pecking at his exposed face, and cawing at unexpected moments, as if to startle him into falling out of the tree. Eventually he gave up and visited the black-stone memorial as usual, the crows close behind.

It was an hour after stage two began Kakashi made his way to the Uchiha residents. Sakura, with her heavy bag by her foot, looked pissed as she waited in the entrance room with Naruto and a sleepy looking Sasuke. He was amused the Uchiha was still brushing out his hair, trying to tame the chaotic black locks, unsuccessfully.

"Today, you will learn one of Konohona's most useful jutsus!" Kakashi remarked as he walked in. It got their attention, not even Sakura knew what he had planned. "Sparkle-Clean no Jutsu!"

Sasuke had no idea what was to happen as he copied his teacher's hand signs, only after did he find himself dressed in a maid outfit, complete with that frilly leg thing he didn't know the name for, and the French frill hat thing on his head. He was paralyzed with shock.

"Good job Sasuke-kun, Sakura-chan, not so much you, Naruto-kun… but interesting."

Sasuke turned and saw each member dressed in a maid outfit identical to his, with a black feather duster in their hands. He wondered what was wrong with Naruto's before noticing instead of cat ears and a cat tail; he had the ears and tail of a fox. Sasuke thought it was, dare he think it, cute. Yet Sasuke wondered why the Kuubi's presences in Naruto would show itself so randomly.

"The Sparkle-Clean technique, once known as Massushiro no Jutsu, was created by several ninja housewives that knew their place in society." He paused to evade Saskura's bag being thrown at his head. "With this technique," Kakashi continued, "You're cleaning ability is tripled! Not just in the time it takes to clean, but in you ability to clean as well, not to mention you all look very cute!" Here Kakashi placed a seal on each of them in the blink of an eye. "And with the seal you can't terminate the jutsu till this house is spotless!"4

Sasuke's eyes were wide with horror.

"I don't want to be a girl for the day!" exclaimed Naruto, his fox ears low from disappointment.

"Then I propose you work quickly, Naruto-kun… and you aren't a girl, exactly." Here Kakashi stepped up to Sasuke, ignoring the Uchiha's death glare, and pulled up the frilly skirt to the dark haired shinobi's surprise. Under it was a much frillier and lacy pair of white lady's underwear, just barley a decent cover for Sasuke's obvious manhood.

Sakura fainted dead away as Naruto tried not to gag, while Sasuke bitch-slapped Kakashi with his feather duster.

**Hope you all enjoyed!**

**1: about 18x18 ft in western measurements…**

**2: Kakashi's a bit sexist…**

**3: http://forums. Kakashi enjoys these things too much**

**Anyone have any ideas for the next chapter?**


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